First let me start this blog by thanking all my readers as I have hit over 500 views. Its a milestone I never expected to hit. Second I want to thank a friend for her support and intelligent questions. For her protection she will forever be known as Fabulous J, I know you know who you are, thank you for being a breathe of fresh air!
Frustration: feeling of dissatisfaction, often accompanied by anxiety or depression, resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems.
Frustration is, well frustrating. Its like being caught between a rock and a hard place. Trapped between your heart and your mind. It truly is a shitty place to be. What makes that feeling worse is when its caused by someone, or worse someone you care about. It is so simple to confuse being loved and cared about with being used. When you truly want something it is easy to let yourself believe its real. You can tell yourself something a million times but that wont make it true. Nor will it make the impossible possible.
What dictates our choices. What drives us to take chances or live life carefully. What pushes us to jump off that ledge when we know its nothing but a free fall afterwards. I think life already contains a decent amount of risk so why not throw caution to the wind and live a little. Stop hiding behind fake beliefs that you use as excuses. Stop doing things because society tells you anything else is wrong. Stop doing whats safe, its boring and you will likely wake up one day filled with regrets.
I don't want to seem angry tonight with all of you amazing people. It just seems like I get the short end of the stick. I get the best mix of brush offs (If you were a guy I would so be into you... you would make a perfect boyfriend...) ladies I am going to make this abundantly clear: I AM NOT A MAN. Yes I look fine in a suit and I can tie my tie better then your husband, but shit or get off the pot, I am not to be teased. Haven't you ever heard the saying "don't poke the bear" well that goes for us awesome dykes as well.
Sorry for the rants tonight people. I am just in a rut. I leave you with the funniest thing I have seen in a while:
I can be your gayfriend: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nb_H6vqhwIg