Sunday, February 15, 2009

If I were a man I`d like to meet somebody like me

Evening gentle viewers. I`ve decided to leave tonight's blog installment in the hands of my other half Billy King. He`s going to be the one posting tonight. He`s been sitting behind the scenes so long that he has asked to finally get to speak his mind tonight. So without further ad0. I present, the one, the only, Mr. Billy King.

Greetings from the ever wondrous and often uneventful fish bowl. I have had the option of having my better half write my thoughts and feelings here but I kind of want a chance to speak my mind. As a male identified individual (in a butches body) I have a distinct view on life, having seen it from both sides. When I was first in the forefront of "cory`s" popularity it was amazing. I felt like I was on a constant high. It was easy to flirt and the attention was intoxicating. I honesty couldn't see anything wrong with it. Then I started to encounter a "none queer" reaction to my appearance. When women crossed the street for fear of crossing paths with me I realized just how different the sexes are. Men take up space and not in a positive way. They demand that you make them your sole and only focus. I didn't like being that kind of person. I didn't like the fact that in acting that way I was ignoring and hurting those around me.

I`ve requested the help of a spectacular photographer friend to take photo`s of me for a new website I am starting. I would like to have the option to put myself out there for consulting work. Who knows if someone will need a handsome King to show them the ropes of "man hood." I would also like to be able to put myself out there as a performer. I do not really perform that often but I would like to keep that door open for the future. No matter how much work it is, I still miss it very much. I was always a drama kid in high school and liked the cross between performing and gender play that Drag Kinging brought. I`ll fully admit, as I did earlier, that it is easy to get caught up in the "celebrity" aspect that came with it all. For me, now anyway, I miss the energy from the crowd. The high that came from being up there and showing off that attitude. Because after all, that's who I am, I`m the attitude, the spicy, that character that gets into your mind and stays there for days. I am the soft whisper in your ear on the dance floor. That's my appeal... I`m the forbidden. Throughout the years I`ve learned to balance this within the boundaries of "normal" social interactions. I`ve learned to have control and have restraint on my actions. But once and a while you`ll see me surface. Whether in the way I walk or a slight gesture or comment. That's when I`ll give my smirk and walk away...

And I feel on that note I`ll sign off. As always I wish you all a safe and sane night. And to those reading... I tip my fedora to you, until next time. ;)

***Added after original posting*** I have just had to spend the better part of the last 15 mins explaining to very hetero coworders that a women can rape another women. Which then lead to me explaining the fact that women get pleasure from sleeping with other women. I honeltly feel like I am babysitting people at times.

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